Learning to Let Go - Memories Not Material Things

I come from a family that is highly organised, maybe verging on OCD, one that likes detailed plans, spreadsheets, filing systems, order. (Only last night, my brother was sharing with me his online virtual spreadsheet that calculates the energy he generates from his home’s solar panels against the energy expended each day, complete with details of kilowatts spent and the cost. He was in data heaven). I’m anal in my own way. I plan my day, every day, even on the weekend, to the hour.  Wake at 6.00am. By 7.00am start exercising. 8.00am shower. 8.30 to 10.30 Work. 10.30 to 12.30 run errands.  Post office first, coffee, shopping. And so forth.  Yes, I even determine the order in which the errands should be completed based on ridiculous factors. I run my life like a military boot camp.

Extrapolate this to life plans and its easy to see that I was a control freak headed for disaster.  And that’s what happened.  See, I had a plan for my life.  Graduate from high school.  Go to college.  Land a well-paid career.  Marry an amazing man.  Build a new, two story house in the suburbs. Decorate it like the pages from an interior design magazine. Have two kids, and a dog.  Be a wife, a mother, and then a grandmother.  And die.

My plan initially was on track to succeed.  I got to the have two kids and a dog part before it got derailed.  The chaos that ensued was cataclysmic.  At least to my world.  Once I no longer had a plan I didn’t know what to do with my life. For almost eight years I bumbled along, fighting to reign that plan back in, to get back on track.  And then I saw this quote one day.  Maybe the life I planned for myself, just isn’t the path I was supposed to be on this time around.  So I’ve let that planned life go.  I let it go so that I could find the life that is out there waiting for me to build.

Sometimes, often actually, our lives don’t pan out as we planned.  It’s a pain like that.  Don’t be afraid if you see this happening in your life. Don’t let it anger you either. Embrace the unpredictability of it. Let the new doors open.  Find the happiness in the new life that is waiting for you to grasp.